Archives For Uterus

Author M: There go my chances for breakfast, lunch and dinner in bed

Pls feel free to tweet updates on when the egg has been deployed. Thx.


Sidebar Commentary by S: If you could text your uterus…

June 2012

This was the plan:  In fact I had it mapped out in my head since I was a naive 25 year old.  I was going to be one of those lucky girls who got rid of all the uterine defense mechanisms at the exact moment I was ready for a baby and… Oopsy! I’m pregnant!

I got my IUD removed in early February 2012 and actually was pretty lucky to start getting regular periods the next month – just as I had planned.  It had to be my uterus giving me the thumbs up, a sign even, saying to me – I’m ready, let’s get a baby in here stat!

The hubby and I first decided that we would not “try to get pregnant” – we would just not not try.  We would just go along our daily business, have some fun in the sack and simply “see what happens”.  And of course I would walk the same path of my friends (as I had also always planned).  So many of my girlfriends stopped their birth control pills, got funky under the sheets for fun after a great night of wine consumption and got rewarded with a cute little baby for their drunken debotchery.  Surely that would be the case for me as well right?

February, March, April, May and June all rolled by without any oops.  I was shocked.  This is how I had it planned out in my head for years – no more birth control, baby growing in belly in 1, 2 or maybe 3 months max.  I’m a planner and when things don’t go as planned I get very upset.  Our rolls in the hay hadn’t decreased any so it made no sense that I was not pregnant by now!  So finally in June when our hopes for an accidental pregnancy seemed to fail, my husband suggested maybe our grand idea of waiting for an oops was not the way to go.  I hate when he’s right.

Love Author M 


Oh the things you think about while laying on your back… mainly I was thinking about how I ended up in this position.  It had been two weeks since my husband and I decided it was time to kick out the plastic T-shaped squatter occupying the space within my uterus.  We had been married one year but I was already 34 years old and my husband even older.  The number 35 was hurdling towards me like a shot put.  I mean after 35 means more risk to me and more risk to a kid.  We’re talking needles in the belly, genetic testing, preterm labor.  Not to mention the slowing of my metabolism which was already becoming a pain in the ass – I mean if it’s so hard to lose weight pre-pregnancy, how hard would it be if I was 38 and trying to lose baby fat?  Scary.  All of it was scary.  But this was the beginning to the journey.  One thing I did know was that it was going to involve more days and nights laying on my back and thinking about all sorts of things.  But making a baby is fun right?  
So here I was two weeks after our big decision and I had just had a conversation while laying on my back that involved the words “Pull it out!”  It’s what I yelled to my gynecologist as she yanked the IUD out of my barren uterus.  And POP! Out it came in a quick second.  
And just like that it was official:  no one was manning the fort any longer.  My ute was unarmed and unprotected.  Time to let the enemy through the gates. 

Love Author M